“Don’t Go In The House” or “Go in the house with an UZI”-my fuckin review

I just watched this older horror movie for the first time the other night. It was made in 1980, and is about this pervy dude who has a fucked up mom. The mom burns his arms when he does bad shit, like wake up or talk or whatever. So I guess he liked it because he is still living with her at 30. Well anyway they call him a “Faggot” at work (I didn’t write it, shut up I am just telling you what they called him that made him mad). Then he goes home and his mom has just fallen over dead, he is sad for a minute but then realizes he can do whatever he wants to now, like jump on the bed and play his Disco very loud. Then her dead body starts talking to his ass, so he keeps his dead mom in a room to chat with. Next he starts offering out rides to pretty chicks, then says “Hey can we stop by my house to say hello to my mom”. WHAT THE FUCK, NO FUCKING WAY PERVY DUDE. DROP ME OFF AT THE MALL SO I CAN GO SHOPPING AT “5-7-9’s”. Later  this dumb chick GOES INTO THE HOUSE (when i was watching it I said out loud “BITCH DON’T GO IN THE HOUSE”) with the pervy dude, who is ugly just saying, I was like if he was famous or normal to good-looking I could see her going in. HE WAS UGLY. Then he knocks her ass out and puts her in this metal room NUDE and hanging from the ceiling, then he pours gasoline all over her and takes a flame thrower out and burns her alive.  It happens. Hell I have been on worse dates, or dates that I wanted to be burned alive on. In the end sometimes the burned victims come back as ghosts and shit. I didn’t think it was scary, and the bad guy bored me, the dead mom was cool though. If you like going into pervy dudes houses then this is the movie for you.

The Trailer:

THE FACTS:

A. Don’t go into a pery ugly dudes house. EVER!! Why do chicks always have to be polite, fuck being polite, stab that mother fucker when he even ask you to come over.

B. If my mom was burning me when I was age 10, I am going to tell that bitch “PEACE OUT” at age 11, then go live with Fagin from Oliver Twist and make money tricking and pick pocketing.

C. I am not going to burn people in my house, I will do that shit outside and roast marshmallows, I mean if i was crazy. hahaha

D. I hope dead people start talking to me, sometimes I get bored at my apartment when nobody is around.

E. Parents will drive you crazy. Ask Will Smith, those bitches just don’t understand.

F. I do love the title to this movie. I love titles that are long like “Don’t tell my mom the babysitters dead”.

G. Is it that easy to get someone to go home with you, I must be doing something wrong.

H. Their cell phones didn’t work because it was only 1980.

I. The trailer was cool though and poster.

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