“Devil” or “Satan takes time out of his busy schedule to ride elevators” -my fuckin review

I finally got watch “Devil” tonight. I wanted to see it in the theatre but didn’t get a chance. Now first of all this movie was not directed by M. Night Shyamalan, so if you are scared to go see his films just know he only wrote the story. Ok so basically the story is about this group of people who all get into an elevator (elevator 6, get it like 666)  and push up. As they start their ride up the elevator gets stuck, stuck by THE DEVIL. So then the shit hits the fan, lights are flickering and people start dying. The mystery of the story is who is the devil on this elevator ride to hell. I thought it was interesting and I like movies where people are trapped in a house or elevators. I didn’t really care for the cast, and there was this spanish security guard that was really forced, who keep talking about it being the Devil, but his logic was this “My momma told me that if someone commits suicide and then someone dies after that it mean the devil is here” WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, I have never heard of this shit before and my grandmother was Puerto Rican bitch. Ok so I don’t want to say much more so as not to give away anything. If you are bored and looking for some religious jargon loosely thrown out, and some dark elevator rides this jam is for you. If you scare easy you will probably jump, if this was an episode of the TV show “Supernatural” I would have said “This shit was a really good episode this week”. It is also on On Demand, so give it a whirl its a cute ride with another Shyamalan twist at the end.

THE TRAILER:

THE FACTS:

A. I do like stories where people are trapped in a building or some shit.

B. I was in 2 different elevators that fell while I was in them. It scared the shit out of me, but there was no devil in there, and I also climbed out.

C. You mean to tell me 5 people in an elevator aint got a flash light on them. BITCH I DO RIGHT NOW.

D. The “Devil” in this movie is lame and boring and wears black contacts.

E. The theme song was the best part.

F. How you not going to play Aerosmith’s “Love in an Elevator” in this movie WHAT THE FUCK.

G. I wish Kevin Vickery had been the Devil in this movie that makes more sense to me haha

H. I feel like a spanish character who is overly religious is racist. I know plenty of Ricans who aint down with Jesus.

I. OMG this should be a ride at Universal Studios. Like you get in the elevator and someone scratches you in the dark or some shit.

J. Then the spanish guy said if toast falls jelly side down then the devil is near. WHAT THE FUCK!

K. I feel like if I was the devil, I would have bigger goals than riding elevators all day. I mean I would be busy planning the apocalypse, not wondering what is on floor 36. Maybe if it was a demon that worked for the devil. I could by that more.

3 thoughts on ““Devil” or “Satan takes time out of his busy schedule to ride elevators” -my fuckin review

  1. Yeah, I just watched this piece of shit. It was interesting until the very end, when everything started to get really lame and then it ended. Why are his stories so weak? They seem to building toward something so interesting and intense, and then lead up to something really lame. And yes, the overly religious security guard was just ridiculous. I want a time refund.

  2. Yeah, the religious security guard was quite comical. Jam toast falling jam side down? wasn’t that an episode of Mythbusters? i guess the Devil was there too. i get that he was trying to say that when the Devil is around, things tend to go wrong, but i think he could have found a better way to show it rather than wasting a perfectly good breakfast.

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