“Case 39” or “I Hate You Renée Zellweger”- my fuckin review

OH MY GOD! Yes I know better, but I wanted to keep an open mind. So we just watched he movie “Case 39” it is about a social worker named and played by Renée Zellweger. She takes on case, yep you guessed it, case number 39. Case 39 is a little girl who can’t act and her parents are trying to kill her because she is a demon who can’t act. The parents get arrested and Renée Zellweger takes this little demon bitch home to raise or some shit. Then Renée, who has yet to open up her eyes in the movie (They are always closed shut), starts noticing that the girl is probably a demon. The shittiest demon you have ever seen, I hate that little girl. In the end the little demon bitch starts making fucking phone calls to people and then they die somehow. IF YOU ARE A DEMON YOU DON’T HAVE TO MAKE FUCKIN PHONE CALLS, GO KILL THEM IN PERSON BITCH. Ok this movie is shit, Renée Zellweger is shit, that little demon bitch is shit, the score is shit, and the poster is shit. If you want to see a shitty rip of  “The Omen” or if you like Renée Zellweger then this movie is for you. You know what, if you like Renée Zellweger then you should stop reading this whole fuckin blog. She is shit and sounds like Meg Tilly when she talks.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. I hate you Renée Zellweger.

B. Bradley Cooper is a good actor, and he is barely in this movie. He gets a phone call from the little demon bitch and then fucking bee’s start coming out his ears. I AM SERIOUS.

C. Renée Zellweger has an answering machine, do people still have these devices?

D. That little girl in this movie is ugly and she couldn’t act. If this movie had Meryl Streep and Dakota Fanning in it then maybe it would have worked. This little girl was fake, forced and forgettable.

E. A demon who makes phone calls. Give me a fuckin break.

F. Renée Zellweger’s face made me sick, I went to the bathroom twice watching this movie. Open your eyes you trick!!!!! She looks like a fucking blind Alvin from Alvin and the chipmunks.

G. This movie is really a mess and was stupid.

H. It was a disgrace to horror.

I. If I knew her I would staple her eyelids open.

J. The score sounded like it should have been on an episode of Unsolved Mysteries about U.F.O’s.

K. The title is fucking stupid too. “Little Demon Bitch” sounds better.

L. Hey Renée speak up we can’t hear you and I have surround sound too. Mousey Asssssssssss!

M. One of the worst films of last year. This shit was laughable.

N. Look at the poster, and the tagline. SHIT! “Some DVD cases should never be opened.”

10 thoughts on ““Case 39” or “I Hate You Renée Zellweger”- my fuckin review

  1. I really like comedian Nick Kroll’s description of Renee: “Renee Zellweger looks like she is made of marzipan. Marzipan is a waxy, candy substance that looks like it’s made out of Renee Zellweger.”

  2. ur an ass. that little girl is not uglyy that is mean as hell. who are you to call a LITTLE GIRL UGLY?? and if you dont like renee’s movies, then why the fuck did u go see it and make a web page about it? huh EDDIE RAY, GROW UP. I shouldn’t even be replying to this, cause it means u win. But SERIOUSLYY u are an ass! And “your fucking review” sucked(:

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