“Polyester” or “Divine is a Housewife Who Smells Her Feet”- my fuckin review

Ok I have seen John WatersPolyester” before but it has been a long time, and it was like watching a new film again. First of all this movie was filmed in ODORAMA and it comes with a scratch n sniff card. The movie lets you know when to scratch n sniff as you watch. OK the movie opens in suburbia (neighborhoods and shit) with Divine playing housewife Francine Fishpaw. Her husband owns a porno theatre, her son Dexter is into feet and sniffing paint, and her daughter Lulu is into tight pants and partying. One night Lulu and her boyfriend decide to go “drive by brooming”, and they hit a black lady gospel singer on the ass and then she steals a bus and goes after Lulu, and bites the tire on the car so that can’t get away. Meanwhile Francine and her husbands marriage is on the rocks and he is cheating on her with trash. Francine enlists the help of her best friend Cuddles to go spy on them. Cuddles finds out that Francine’s husband is cheating and they get a divorce. Then Dexter get busted as the “Baltimore Stomper” while stomping on a ladies foot at the supermarket. Now Lulu is pregnant and is sent to live with nuns, while Francine turns to alcohol. The family dog commits suicide because he can’t take it anymore. Later Dexter gets cleaned up in jail and paints pictures of feet, Lulu finds peace through the art of Macrame, and Francine falls in love with a hunky dude named Todd Tomorrow. Don’t get your hopes up Todd eventually cheats on Francine with her mother. I love the soap opera feel to this film, and its overdramatic acting. This is John Waters gold and if you have not seen it, then go rent/buy the shit. The DVD comes with a scratch n sniff card too. So if you love John Waters, Divine, girls in tight pants, boys getting off to feet, and a theme song written by Deborah Harry then this shit is for you.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. I love Divine as Francine Fishpaw.

B. Here is the scratch and sniff card they gave out for the movie.

C. Here is her daughter Lulu. She just wants to party.

D. Here is her son Dexter (Ken King) aka the “Baltimore Stomper”, I wish there were people who got turned on by stomping on someone’s foot hahaha

E. Here is the scene where Dexter gets expelled and stomps on ladies foot.

F. Here is Francine and her lover Todd Tomorrow (Tab Hunter).

G. John Waters films really do make sense to me. I love all the characters in them. They seem real to me.

H. I wish I could have a room that looked like their living room in this film.

I. The best scenes from the movie.

J. Seriously to learn about filmmaking watch John Waters films. These films are honest, good or bad they are honest.

K. I want the theme song.

L. Lulu’s boyfriends name was Bobo. I love that name.

M. Divine smells her feet in this. I bet they smelled like cheese and whiskey.

N. I bet they had fun making these films.

O. What the fuck is macrame anyway?

P. This poster is awesome.

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