“The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)” or “Girl, I Gotta Shit More (Full of Shit Sequence)”- my fuckin review

I just watched the The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence) last night with Matt and Tristan and here is the movie review. Let me just say I thought the first one was just OK and yeah I guess it was gross, but whatever. I mean you at some fake shit, so what. Divine at real dog shit in John Waters “Pink Flamingos” back in 1972, so fake shit aint that impressive. Meanwhile back to the story. So this ugly creepy ass fat dude who doesn’t speak named Martin has also watched Part 1 (yeah the the first film exists in part 2) and loves it and watches it on repeat and jerks off to it and shit. He decides he wants to literally recreate the first movie but with a shitload more people attached to each other. Now he is beating people over the heads with a crow bar and taking them to a warehouse to make a big ass human centipede, but Martin is no surgeon. This will be a half ass operation at best. Martin lives with his insane mother and was raped by his father, and also shits his bed a lot. Don’t worry I am not giving the plot, it really is just the same basic story as the first one in any way, just new people shitting in each others mouths. Eventually the Director seems to get pissed off at the people who complained about how part 1 did not show enough gore and shit, so everyone is getting cut open and then doo doo is flying everywhere. Gas noises including. If I was supposed to be horrified here I was not. I was laughing. I am still laughing at all this ass explosion. HAHA Anyway I guess it’s gory and gross for people, and a baby gets stepped on hahaaha too much. Hahaha I could care less about anyone in this movie, I felt nothing for anyone. Some of the scenes were cheesy and forced, and over acted. How many times can we someone take a shit in someone else’s mouth and we are supposed to be horrified. Will part 3 just be more humans lined up shitting? Yes, they are filming part 3 now. Does anyone even own these movies? I watch them once and then I move on, because you can’t relate to anyone in the films and nor do I like any character in these movies. You are just waiting to see who shits first. Haha When it was over I felt like I had to shit. I don’t hate this movie, and I laughed during it, but honestly so what, who cares. Well if you like face to ass trains, people eating shit, fat dudes with little dicks, ugly moms, babies getting stepped on, cheesy score, and a Director who seems angry at his audience then this movie is for you. Hahah SHITTTTTTTT! PS. While watching this movie I was glueing a costume together with strong glue called Gorilla Glue. This could be why I thought it was so funny. In fact watch this movie with a bottle of open glue you will like it better.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. This guy is ugly and didn’t speak.

B. I hope the sequel is called “Human Millipede”.

C. EAT SHIT!

D. The most important thing about a movie is its characters, without them you got shit (get it shit).

E. I honestly felt no tension during this movie at all.

F. I did love Martin’s mom.

G. At one point he jerked off with sand paper, they did not show it. haha

H. I wish the movie’s theme song was from the TV show “MARTIN”.

I. Haha baby in the floor board of car getting stepped on. WOW haha

J. I wish somebody would have shit on the wall and the shit would have spelled out “Centipede”.

K. If an ugly little fat turdy man comes up to you and doesn’t speak with a crow bar run away or he will make you eat someone’s shit.

L. Here is the Gorilla Glue I was using.

M. This movie was in black and white, I assume so that they could show all the blood and shit and get away with it more. If it was in color it was have been banned more I guess. Haha It was banned in the United Kingdom. Haha what a bunch of wimps! America loves shit and to eat it.

N. Part 3 is called “The Human Centipede III (Final Sequence)“. Directed by Tom Six, he did all 3. I give him credit for at least doing what he wants to do and shitting all over everyone. Haha. Tom Six said that the first 2 films will look like Disney movies compared to part 3 film. Here is a pic of him.

O. Here is my review for part one. https://eddieraysmoviereviews.wordpress.com/2010/06/16/the-human-centipede-or-get-your-face-outta-my-ass-my-fuckin-review/

P. In case you don’t know me blood and shit does not wig me out at all. So bring it on bitch, but I need characters that are cool and memorable. People I want to know and hang with, even if they are bad guys. This movie had none of that.  Throw a bone here. I need to know some people. I wish Martin would have taken female pop singers and made a centipede. Now you are talking! Madonna, Lady Gaga, Paula Abdul, Ke$ha, Janet Jackson, Taylor Swift, Pink, etc. WOW now that is a shit train I want to see.

Q.  This poster makes it looks like an orgy. It was not. It was a lot of shitting haha. I love saying the word “shit” in this review.

4 thoughts on ““The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)” or “Girl, I Gotta Shit More (Full of Shit Sequence)”- my fuckin review

  1. Well, I bought the first one on Blu-Ray b/c it was $10 cheaper than the DVD on Amazon. I bought it without even watching it first b/c I knew that I had to have a movie like that in my collection. The concept of it was so bizarre and different to me, I could barely wrap my mind around it. I was really freaked out about watching it, and I drank heavily to take the edge off. I ended up loving it, even though it is certainly not the best movie ever made, and there aren’t really any lovable characters. I laugh at myself now for having been freaked out initially. I genuinely look forward to buying the second and third ones, just to have my collection complete. It’s somewhat of a novelty thing for me. Great review as always, btw.

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