“Devils Due” or “You Got What You Deserved Honkey” my fuckin review

Here is my review for “Devil’s Due“. Okay so first off this is a found footage film, but since we are in 2014 all found footage films are in HD now. So whatever. This film begins with a happy white couple (Allison Miller and Zach Gilford) that are getting married and filming fucking everything in their lives. They are so in love that it makes me fuckin sick. It’s annoying!!! We get it, you love each other. Maybe I’m just bitter because I’m single. Fuck you! Now they go on their honeymoon to the Dominican Republic. There they decide to go turn it up one night and then they let a cab driver take them to some “SECRET” party in these fucking caves below the city. UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM WHAT?????? I’m not going into fucking caves with some cat I don’t know ever. At this point my attitude changes for this shitty couple. Now they are just another dumb ass white couple, doing dumb ass white shit. They are drugged and the next day they wake up in their hotel and she is pregnant. Next they fly back home and see their front door is unlocked. HUHHHHHH? If I go home right now and my door is unlocked and my roommate is nowhere to be found I will call the police! Now she starts acting fuckin crazy and gets super demon strength cuz she got the devil in her. In the end the battle between good and evil and shit. Okay so I didn’t like this movie. Not because it’s found footage, but because the 2 main characters are annoying and keep doing stupid shit. They are idiots. It’s fine to make mistakes and shit, but they got what they deserved. I was siding with the Satan worshippers the whole movie. Kill these honkeys! It was just silly, forced and hokey. If Rosemary’s Baby and Paranormal Activity fucked (without condoms) and had a baby they would name it “Devil’s Due“. This baby would be ugly too. So if you love found footage horror films, a dumb ass white couple, a demon baby, and cave parties this is the movie for you. It was not for my ass, and bored me. Watch on Netflix for free or just get pregnant with your own devil baby and film that.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. White people stay home, cuz you do dumb shit when you float outside the United States.

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B. I will abort that demon baby.

C. If you get pregnant with a demon baby then I want a divorce.

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D. Satan worshippers are everywhere.

E. If your wife punches out windows on an SUV, then she has a demon in her.

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F. Don’t leave your doors unlocked ever.

G. You have no business going to a cave party.

Also this song should have been played at the cave party.

H. Guns will stop Satan worshippers.

I. The marketing for the movie was great but the movie was not.

J. Satan is in.

K. 2 posters.

Foreign poster: Hot

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American one : Boring Devils-Due-IntlPoster

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