“Dolphin Tale 2” or “Dolphins are Bisexual Magic” – my fuckin review

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Here is my review for “Dolphin Tale 2“. It is the sequel to “Dolphin Tale“. Winter is back with an all new tale bitch! Remember that Winter is a real dolphin that lost his tail in a boating accident. He wears a fake tail now. This time the kids are older and Winter has a best friend (lover) dolphin who is sick. Now Winter is looking for a good time with a new Bestie. If they don’t find him a new friend they will have to put Winter back in the wild to die. To have a dolphin captive you must have at least 2 dolphins together so they ain’t lonely and can make out. You also can not just pick a new dolphin from the sea, they have to be sick to stay there. So the kids Sawyer and Hazel are stressing about Winter getting kicked out. Also Sawyer is wanting to go on some summer cruise. Harry Connick Jr. is singing the blues too over Winter’s depression and best friend loss. Morgan FreemanKris Kristofferson and Ashley Judd show up cuz they were in the first one and laugh. In the end Winter finds happiness/Hope (Hope is the name of the new lover they find him) and you can go visit his ass in Florida on the real. Okay so I love these movies. I love watching dramas about dolphins. I love Dolphins swimming and chilling. They are the bisexuals of the sea and I love them. This dolphin’s real life is just so interesting to me. He needs a fuckin reality show. So if you love family adventures with dolphins and Harry Connick then this is the movie for you. I love watching those bitches swim and I love that it’s loosely based on “real” events.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. The gang is all back.

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B. Nathan Gamble and Cozi Zuehlsdorff are no doctors and save turtles.

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C. Charles Martin Smith directed this movie and the first one too. He was also in “Starman (1984)“.

D. You can go see Winter here.

http://seewinter.com/winter

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E. Look how happy they are about these dolphins.

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DOLPHIN TALE 2

F. Winter Toys.

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G. The other dolphins throw shade at Winter cuz he doesn’t have a tail. It’s fucked up.

H. This song should have been in the end credits.  “Rush Hour” by Jane Wiedlin.

I. Article on Bi Dolphins.

http://www.worldpolicy.newschool.edu/wpi/globalrights/sexorient/marine-gay.html

J. Looks at this magical mother fucker.

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One response to ““Dolphin Tale 2” or “Dolphins are Bisexual Magic” – my fuckin review

  1. Pingback: My Top Ten Movies of 2014 You Bitch! | EDDIE RAY BREAKS THAT SHIT DOWN!

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