“Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation” or “Tom Cruise is a Spy Again” my fuckin review

Here is my review for “Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation“. Okay the movie starts off with Tom Cruise and he is a spy again. Now Tom Cruise is hanging off a plane. Then Tom Cruise is shooting people and goes Rogue. Later Tom Cruise is chasing spies. Meanwhile Tom Cruise has a car chase scene. Now Tom Cruise has figured out there is ANTI- IMF team. Then Tom Cruise meets a girl. Later Tom Cruise hangs out with Jeremy RennerSimon Pegg, and Ving Rhames. In the end Tom Cruise gets crazy and kills some spies and hugs Alec Baldwin. Okay so this is part 5 of the Mission Impossible film series. I really loved the TV series for Mission: Impossible. Both the 1960’s and 1980’s ones. All the films literally just feel like the same movies over and over again. Are they bad films? No, but are they memorable? No. They seem like one long ass movie. Except Mission: Impossible III I did love that one, but it was directed by J.J. Abrams and it really felt like a different story with characters and ideas and emotions. The rest of the films are generic and we were just waiting to see what Tom Cruise’s hair looks like blowing in the wind. I mean yeah he really hung off a plane while it was flying. Okay. You did it. We are proud of you? Thank Scientology you survived. Anyway I love spy movies so I keep going back but then I wonder why my ass goes half way through the movie. I guess I’m a goddamn dummy. Anyway skip this movie and just watch part 3 again. This Rogue Nation is not a bad film, but so what who cares, we have seen all this shit before. Tom Cruise is alway Tom Cruise. I never know who the fuck he is playing in his films. So if you love Tom Cruise then see this movie and you will probably love this movie if not then skip it. Wait for the next James Bond movie. 

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. They stop numbering these Mission Impossible movies so you will forget that they are on number 5. They did the same shit with the “The Land Before Time” movies. There are like 13 of those fuckin movies.

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B. You can’t beat Peter Graves. Ever! He looks younger than Tom.

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C. Here is Tom Cruise talking about his stunt hanging off the plane.

D. Ving Rhames is the real star of these movies and he should be the main character.

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E. The original theme by Lalo Schifrin. He is amazing.

1966 Opening. THE BOMB.

1988 Opening. Meow!

F. Tom hold on. Why is everything “Rogue” now. Shut the fuck up.

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G. Tom’s boobs in the movie.

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H. Can you imagine hanging this bullshit on your wall. It would look better with Rogue from X-Men on it. Rogue Cut.

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