“The Revenant” or “Watch Leo Suffer for 2 1/2 Hours” my fuckin review

Here is my review for “The Revenant“. Leo is back and this time he is suffering. Okay so in this film Leo is some sort of tracker that is leading a team of dudes back from the harsh cold of the wilderness. This shit is old school America so there is no Wal-Mart to help them with supplies. Leo has his son with him who is also Native American and Tom Hardy is there and is racist and hates Leo. Later this fuckin bear shows up and fucks Leo to hell and back and Tom Hardy wants to leave his ass for dead. I mean shit it’s snowing and he is too heavy to carry. So true, you gotta leave a bitch. Leo’s son is all “no way I love my dad” and Leo loves him back. Eventually Tom Hardy, Will Poulter, and his son stay behind to watch him while that wait on his ass to die, but Tom is tired of that shit so he kills the son and leave Leo to die. Then He and Will head back to Fort Something Log Walls America. Now Leo finds hate strength to crawl his ass across the wilderness to take revenge on Tom Hardy. Along the way Leo runs into all kinds of suffering. He even has to Tautaun (sleep inside his horse in the snow) his dead horse in the snow. It’s fucked up. Okay so I did like this movie a lot, it really is just a revenge movie with heart, but a good one. Leo really did love his son and his son loved him. I was like, fuck I wish Leo was my dad. It is a very quiet film at times, so don’t expect non-stop action. You really are watching this man struggle for 2 1/2 hours. Everyone is great in it too (Leo, Tom Hardy, Forrest Goodluck Leo’s son, and Will Poulter). I love that this film is also about the misunderstanding and mistreatment of Native Americans also. You see how one mans compassion for his Native American son and others went a long way. It’s also a sad movie and you will be sad watching it. It’s also loosely based on a true events. So that’s fucked up too. It really is a sad, quiet, brutal, and beautiful film that you should check out. It will probably win best picture.

The Trailer:

The Bear Facts:

A. Look at Leonardo DiCaprio‘s face. Literally the whole movie.

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B. I bet Leo finally wins the Oscar for this movie, but he deserves it for “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape” and “Critters 3” and “Total Eclipse.

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C. Tom Hardy is a bitch in this movie, but does well as usual.

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D. Ryuichi Sakamoto composed the score. It was nice and moody as fuck. Listen here:

E. Alejandro González Iñárritu is the director. He also made “Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)” and “Babel“. 

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F. BEAR RAPE! I mean a bear will fuck you up!
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G. Domhnall Gleeson is in this movie too. 

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H. Leo’s best friend Lukas Haas is in this movie too.

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I. Everyone in this movie looks like stepped on old school wilderness American shit.

J. This poster is blue.

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