“Kingsman: The Golden Circle” or “Kingsmess: Golden Character Collision of Alcoholism” my fuckin review

Here is my review for “Kingsman: The Golden Circle“. Okay I loved  the first “Kingsman: The Secret Service” so I was excited to see this movie. Here is a link to my first review https://eddieraysmoviereviews.wordpress.com/2015/03/06/kingsman-the-secret-service-or-a-chav-james-bond-my-fuckin-review/

Okay so this movie starts off and Eggsy (Taron Egerton) is a full-blown spy now with a girlfriend (The princess at the end of the first movie). He is doing cartwheels and hanging from cars and shit. This time there is a group of bad guys called The Golden Circle ran by Julianne Moore that want to legalize drugs by killing people with drugs. What nowwww? Anyway the Kingsman have to get help from The Statesman, who are American spies that make whisky. Now they are teamed up with Channing Tatum and Halle Berry and a lot of Booze. Then Elton John shows up for comic relief over and over again, and Eggsy has to finger some girl and cheat on his future wife so that he can save the world. Yes, this is real. It’s a lot. In the end robot dogs show up, more Elton John and more booze. 

Okay so like I said I dug the first movie but this movie feels all over the place and there is a room full of stars that have nowhere to go. They are just standing around and bumping into each other with bad lines. Eggsy’s princess girlfriend should have been deleted. It’s just dumb and irritating. We get it people get married to dumb people. Then he fingers that girl and she is mad for an hour and then the wedding is still on. Like it really doesn’t matter? Huh? They even cut to Eggsy’s finger going inside the girl’s vagina in the movie. Ummmm What the fuck Haha.

I also honestly don’t know if they were pro drugs or anti drugs by the end of the film. Who the hell knows. I do know they were pro alcohol. There was booze everywhere. Tables, buildings, belt buckles, etc were designed after whisky products. Everything and everyone was drinking up Johnny. If you are a frat boy you will love this movie. Start a drinking game. Drink every time they drink or you see alcohol shit in it. I promise you will be dead or in the hospital 15 minutes into the movie. Meanwhile Elton John shows up for cameo joke. Then you are like okay whatever that’s cute. Then 10 times later I am like seriously. This shit ain’t funny. Also his dialogue was “fuck you” (sounds like my films, fuck you too). We get it you’re a bitch I guess, that somehow can fight like you are in the Matrix. Gross. Anyway yes I was disappointed in this movie and the more I think about it the more I dislike it. It was like a disorganized spy movie made by an 18-year-old frat boy who was drunk. So skip or wait for Netflix.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. I do think Taron Egerton is cool in stuff. In this one he doesn’t seem as at ease as the first one, but whatever.

B. If you are an alcoholic skip this movie. It is a non-stop booze ad. Honestly weirdly a lot.

Drink it up at Comic Con.

http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/la-et-comic-con-2017-watch-halle-berry-kingsman-1500580488-htmlstory.html

They are going to release the Bourbon from the film too.

http://screencrush.com/kingsman-golden-circle-bourbon-featurette/

C. Julianne Moore even felt out-of-place in this movie. 

D. The whole character of Eggy’s character (Hanna Alström) should have been deleted. It was a waste of time. Kill her. 

E. Don’t tell me I have to sit through Elton John cursing people out every five minutes then having him flying through the fucking air in fight scenes and winking at the camera. If this interests you, then this is the movie for you. I wanted to walk out.

F. Channing Tatum aka Tequila was a waste of time too. He should have been in it more. He was wasted. There was a shot of him on the table and his bulge was huge I don’t know if this was real or supposed to be a joke?

G. Stars, Stars everywhere and plenty of booze to drink. 

Watch us review America! Eddie & Max: Deal With It America!

BRAND NEW! Take a look at me and Max Fisher’s journey across America. From LA to Atlanta. See Roswell and where the aliens landed. See me bitch about the desert. See Max’s first and last time in New Orleans. See us skip over Mississippi all together. Take a look and we hope you laugh or hate us whichever. Yes this was that trip with a million pics on instagram. Also add us on https://www.instagram.com/videovacation/ 

Scream 2- Cici Cooper auditions!

Check out our Scream 2 Cicic Cooper auditions.

Here is the original Cici Cooper.

Now click here to watch 2 videos of the auditions. Slide Instagram over for second video.

“Cult of Chucky” or “Multi-Chuckys But Still Not Enough Chuckys” – my fuckin review

Here is my review for “Cult of Chucky“.  First of all of the Chucky movies are entertaining as hell. These last 2 films have tried to make them more serious and scary again etc. I think what makes Chucky fun and memorable are the laughs though.  Okay so Nica (Fiona Dourif) is back and she is in a mental hospital because of shit that happened from the last film. They think she killed people but it was Chucky. This plot already bores me. The nobody believes her routine, while Chucky goes around killing people. Meanwhile what issssss cool is that Andy (Alex Vincent) from part 1 and 2 is back and all grown up and pissed. He is dealing with Chucky’s head that talks. Also Tiffany is back, well Jennifer Tilly. Remember Tiffany took over Jennifer Tilly’s body in “Seed of Chucky“.  I love her in these movies too. So they are running around while there are a bunch of Chucky’s popping off killing people in the hospital. There is a new voodoo spell that multiples him. Anyway some twists happen and stay until the end of the credits for another surprise guest. I will tell you it’s not Glen, their son. Who I was hoping was going to be in this movie. He was not and I am pissed! 

Okay this is a Chucky movie so it’s fun to watch, but will I buy it? No. Why because they went away from the fun and the laughs. I get it. This is what Writer and Director Don Mancini is probably wanting and he is saying “We want to go back to the scares of part 1 and 2”. Well bitch you are on part 7 and we are too familiar with this character now. There are toys, posters, and T-shirts of him everywhere. Nobody is scared anymore so you better make his ass entertaining. Which you did with “Bride of Chucky” and “Seed of Chucky“. So deal with it.  Now you got us taking this serious (boring) ride again with you with “Curse” and “Cult” and we are falling asleep. We are just sitting there waiting for the next scene with Chucky. We wished the Tiffany doll was in it more too. I don’t care about Nica or even Andy or whoever. They are just in the way of the real show. Chucky and Tiffany! Don’t take me to the zoo and make me listen to humans talk for 2 hours about the rules of the zoo. Where are the lions and monkeys! You feel me. They should have been chasing Andy and other characters from all the films for 2 hours raising hell! Listening to Ariana Grande or some shit. Anyway figure it out. We love Chucky and Tiffany and we want to love them more. We even love their love for each other! Power couple. Watch it if you love Chucky, but it will just make you wish you had more. Also the whole movie I am waiting on Glen and he can’t even get a cameo or some shit! Fuck this!

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. Brad Dourif is the voice of Chucky and he is brilliant. We want more Chucky screen time. Fuck all these dumb humans clogging up the screen.

B. Honestly my favorite Chucky movie is Bride of Chucky” and then “Seed of Chucky. Because they had fun with it and made it all about Chucky and the laughs and screams, and the cursing and killing and the craziness of it all. Yes, maybe it’s not really scary or whatever, but were any of them. These 2 movies launched Chucky into a new level of icon status. Watch this trailer. The jokes in it are amazing.

Look at what each film grossed!

Child’s Play – $44,196,684 (Worldwide) 

Child’s Play 2 – $35,763,605 (Worldwide)

Child’s Play 3 -$20,560,255 (Worldwide)

Bride of Chucky  – $50,671,850 (Worldwide) WINNER! Why? You tell me. People loved this movie!

Seed of Chucky- $24,741,977 (Worldwide)

C.  The “nobody believes me” plot is boring.

D. Nica, Andy, and Tiffany. The Stars of Cult and all the Chucky films.

E. Where the fuck was Glen!!!!!! GOD DAMN!

F.  I mean honestly this scene with all 3 dolls from “Seed of Chucky” is amazing and nuts! Literally brilliant.

God almighty this scene is amazing too.

G. Here is the poster or cover. Boring.

“Jeepers Creepers 3” or “The Cheaper Goes After Country Boys” my fuckin review

Here is my review for “Jeepers Creepers III“. Okay so this is part 3 and it took a while to make. I loved the first “Jeepers Creepers” and “Jeepers Creepers II” was fun also. So I was excited about this one, maybe 10 years ago, but here we are and the protesters say don’t see it because the Director Victor Salva is the real CREEPER. True. Look it up. Anyway the creeper is back and it starts off where one leaves off, outside the police station that Justin Long gets ganked at. The police dude (Brandon Smith) that was in the first Jeepers is back with a wig on or something to act like it’s the same night etc. He teams up with some Creeper Hunters to go find the bitch. Now cut to Meg Foster who is the mother of some kid who died back in 78 (the years John Carpenter’s Halloween came out). She is seeing visions of the creeper and she hates him, also her teen granddaughter owns a pony. Then here comes the country teen boys. Who really looked like they were plucked off the farm. They run into the Creeper and he is pissed and but he always loves the boys. He kills some and chases the girl with the my little pony and a freckle faced boy for a while. Then the Creeper Hunters have some long dialogue here and there. Some shit blows up and it looks like bad Photoshop. In the end there are some surprises and you are surprised, sort of, but “Final Destination 5” did it better.

Okay so first off I do like “The Creeper” monster he is fun and you like seeing him again. His makeup looks cool and he is the best part. Everything just feels like forced filler around his ass. It’s like you love the first movie because it was scary and fun, the second movie was a great idea. A bus breaks down with a bus load of teens on a back road. Amazing. This time it’s basically two old Creeper hunters running around in the daylight looking for the Creeper with bad special effects. I get it, it was lowwwwwww budget this time. I should be thankful it was made I guess. I mean shit they should have cut some of those actors out and spent money on the effects bitch. Honestly we just wanted to see Trish back in the whole movie. The real problem is they wrote themselves in a hole. The Creeper can only be seen for 23 days every 23 years. So ya know, you got films that can only take place for 23 days in 2001 (the first film) or 23 years in the future. I wish they would make Trish in the future fighting him with a jet pack on and lasers or some shit. Anyway it’s fun to watch because you love the Creeper but you will not love this movie. You will be bored with the cop and the creeper hunters and their over dramatic bullshit. You will be bored with My Little Pony girl and freckle face country boy. Meg Foster looks like a witch all the time now since “The Lords of Salem“. She was still great in “They Live“. You really just wait for the Creeper to show back up and that’s it. They didn’t even play the Jeepers Creepers Peepers song. WTF! Not enough coins for effects or songs I guess. If you want to see it in the theater you blew it. It was only playing for one night and for one time. I can see why. Wait for Blu Ray or On Demand. Watch part 1 and 2 and look for all the gay undertones. That will be more fun.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. Jonathan Breck played The Creeper in all 3 movies. He is good as this bitch. 

B. Victor Salva directed all 3 and has a fucked up past. Look it up. 

C. They all looked like real country boys not actors or models. Just dudes down the street throwing hay across your ass.

D. Here is the order of all the films.

  • 1978: Intro/Flashback from Jeepers Creepers 3.
  • 2001: Jeepers Creepers (Days 1-2)
  • 2001: Jeepers Creepers 3 (Days 2-5)
  • 2001: Jeepers Creepers 2 (Days 5-6)
  • Unknown Future: Trish (Gina Davis) Outro from Jeepers Creepers 3
  • 2024: Jeepers Creepers 2 final scene.

E. Gina Philips was in the first one as Trish. The fans want her back. 

F. Meg Foster plays Gaylen Brandon, the mom of The Creeper’s victims in 1978. His name is Kenny Brandon. When Darry (Justin Long) and Trish (Gina Phillips) are driving down a Florida highway before being attacked by The Creeper they discuss the urban legend of Darla and Kenny, kids who got killed on Prom Night back in 1978. Darry found Kenny’s body in The Creepers hang out below the church.

G. Stan Shaw and Brandon Smith (He was in the first Jeepers) were the Creeper Hunters and they chewed up most of the films time and bored me. There characters were boring, forced, and over dramatic. 

H. Where the fuck was the Jeepers Creepers song? No budget for it I guess.

I. Bennett Salvay composed the score for the first 2 movies which were great. The composer for this movie was Andrew Morgan Smith (Trailer Park Shark) it was not good.

I. This poster is nice.

 

Just Give Me The Deetz- Where to buy a Halloween Costume!

A BRAND NEW “JUST GIVE ME THE DEETZ”. Me and Max Fisher talk about where to buy costumes and take a visit to #spirithalloween store. Don’t miss out! We even show you some pics of us in Halloween costumes when were little! Add us on https://www.instagram.com/videovacation/ #lydiadeetz