“Blood Car” or “A Bloody Good Lay”- my fuckin review

I got to watch a movie called “Blood Car” last night with Kevin V. and here is the review. OK at first we thought this movie was going to be a rip off of the movie “Christine” and would be about a car running people over. We were wrong! The movie starts off with a teacher named Archie, and he is a vegan who is trying to design a car engine that runs on wheat grass and not gasoline. It is the near future and gas is like $40.00 bucks a gallon, so nobody can afford to drive anymore and teens have to go have sex in a junkyard because their cars are broke down there. Archie buys his wheat grass from “My Girl” who runs a vegan stand, but he is in love with the girl who runs the meat stand. Later while experimented with the wheat grass engine he cuts himself and the blood from his hand makes the engine run. Hence the title “BLOOD Car”. Now he can drive a car using blood and he is the only one in the city who can drvive. So now the meat stand girl wants to fuck him because he can drive. The only problem is that Archie needs more blood to run that blood car, so he starts killing animals and people to keep it running. In the end his life is in a fucked up comical tailspin, and there is blood everywhere. OK usually I don’t like a lot of independenty films because they can be TOO pretentious and NOT entertaining. They call it the “Entertainment Industry” for a fuckin reason, so entertain me bitch. This movie DOES entertain you and still makes a point, which is what film should fucking do. It has some great lines in it, that I am still saying today. I could have watched the main cast of this film cook fuckin eggs for 2 hours and I would have still been entertaining by them, that is how fun they were. I wish I knew the meat stand girl (Katie Rowlett), she was hot and cool at the same time. She needs her own fucking movie just killing people and beating guys up.  The director was Alex Orr and this bitch has a lot of potential and I will look forward to his next film. So if you want to be entertained, laugh, cry, get turned on, and be covered in blood then this movie is for you. Even the DVD’s menu screen spoke my language. You can get this movie off Netflix. Go rent it or buy it now, its pretty fuckin awesome.

The Trailer:

The Facts:

A. They curse a lot in this movie, so I understood and love the dialogue.

B. Anna Chlumsky is all good in my book. PERIOD!

C. Archie was played by Mike Brune, and I loved his subtle style of comedy.

D. Here is Archie getting “Road Head” (A blow job while driving, very dangerous but a turn on) from the meat stand girl.

E. The story was by Alex Orr, Adam Pinney, and Hugh Braselton. It has been a minute since they made another movie. WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY WAITING ON? They are talented.

F. They killed kids. Brilliant.

G. They predicted the future of gas prices being high.

H. Here is Archie and the meat stand girl having weird drive in movie sex.

I. Watch the trailer, then you will want to watch it.

J.  This Govt. dude (Matt Hutchinson) was funny, but looked cooler with a mustache at the end of the movie.

K. I don’t eat beef or pork.

L. This is the best shot in the entire movie.

M. Check out the filmmakers webpage http://www.fakewoodwallpaper.com/ and you can be a part of their next movie, also here http://www.congratsmovie.com/short.html

N. This biker (Tony Holley) looked tough, but look at the meat stand ladies legs. WOWIE.

O. “Put a taco in my mouth and dick in my ass”. Brilliant.

P. There is a movie playing at the drive-in in one scene and it is a film by Jay Edwards called “Stomp! Shout! Scream!“

Q. THIS IS ONE OF THE BEST POSTERS I HAVE EVER SEEN!